news reporting on murders is always like ‘the victim was described by the people who knew them as polite and funny’ like yeah i fucking bet they did what else are they gonna say. breaking news local man stabbed 1000 times to death, grieving friends and family described the deceased to reporters as ‘a bit of a cunt’, ‘mean and bad’ and ‘just generally kind of annoying, you know?’
bella was lucky she didn’t have a cell phone of any kind because you know ya boi edward would be blowing up that phone 24-7 going “saw a snail today…. effervescent” or some shit equivalent
happy 3 yr anniversary to the post that singlehandedly launched the twilight renaissance
Happy 5 year anniversary to the effervescent snail post
as a kid i had one of those “there’s a monster under my bed” moments except real.
every night i would cry about a ghost or something trying to scare me by knocking on my bedroom windows and walls. like, really loudly, every hour or so, every night. only at night. so my dad was like “heh okay kiddo let’s check it out :) ah see? there’s nothing here :)” and left.
until years later he admitted to me that he did in fact hear the unexplainable knocking when he slept in that room one night, and it kept him awake with fear. and suddenly felt awful for not believing little kid me.
imagine your kid being like “daddy there’s a demon in my closet” and you being like ok son lemme just check that for you :). and you open the door and there’s a demon in the closet
WHAT
ALTYusef Komunyakaa, from "The Cage Walker", Pleasure Dome: New & Collected Poems [ID in ALT]
for the love of god unmute
Muted it took me 6 seconds to figure out what was going on. Unmuted I had tears in my eyes 3 seconds in
the curse of the black pearl vs at world’s end
I love this because you have Elizabeth who couldn’t even defend herself in the first one to becoming this master sword fighter and leader of ALL pirates. You watch Will who was just this angsty little brat head over heels for Elizabeth become this grown man who faced all his demons.
and then there’s Jack
“Elizabeth who couldn’t even defend herself”
Do you mean…
Elizabeth who improvised a weapon when pirates invaded her bedroom
Elizabeth who could have run for the exits but instead went straight for the swords
Elizabeth who demanded to speak with a pirate captain and then used the leverage she had to get him to agree to her demands
Elizabeth who CAME AT BARBOSSA WITH A GODDAMN KNIFE and then fucking STABBED HIM when she couldn’t get away
Elizabeth who was trapped on a tiny island with nothing but crates of rum and a man she couldn’t stand and who used those supplies to summon a rescue party for herself
Elizabeth who made a rope out of sheets and climbed down the back of a ship to save the day herself when no one would listen to her about how dangerous the pirates were
Elizabeth who snuck onto the Black Pearl, knocked two cursed pirates straight off their ship, and rescued Jack’s entire crew
Elizabeth who rowed straight back into danger without any backup instead of running away with everyone else
Elizabeth who came to Will’s rescue with a blunt object and a one-liner
Elizabeth who proceeded to team up with Will to take down all the remaining pirates in the cave
Elizabeth who – without being asked or told what was going on – faked unconsciousness to create a distraction for Will’s rescue of Jack
Elizabeth who stepped in front of a ring of muskets, successfully protecting Jack and Will from being shot or captured
Elizabeth may have learned some impressive sword tricks in the later movies, but she was a Badass from day one.
preach
Elizabeth Swann is a queen.
So poor people don’t deserve to have money?!
THEY’LL JUST WASTE IT ON SURVIVAL!
Also, if you’ve taken more than a high school economics course taught by someone who has never stepped foot in a college economics class,
Giving $500 to poor people multiplies it REALLY FAST. That $500 immediately goes into the economy and ripples more purchases until it hits a rich pocket.
Giving $500 to a billionaire takes $500 out of the economy permenantly. You could have set it on fire and made no difference.
That is such an important part of the conversation that rich people seem to purposefully misunderstand whenever it’s brought up
Money exists to be spent, not hoarded. Yes, people should have saving, but no one should be sitting on a pile of money too big to spend in a single lifetime. “The economy” as a concept only works if people are spending money, and the people hoarding the money are so quick to blame the people who barely have any when the economy starts to fail
Having a big string of numbers in an offshore account doesnt make you an economic genius, it makes you a parasite that is ruining the economy for everyone else
“unions drowned out the voice of the individual 🥺” I can promise you employers were not listening to the voice of the individual to begin with
individualist ideals are a plague, in direct opposition to the labor movement. you are stronger together than apart. hate to tell you this but your coworkers are humans as well. organize
i often think about that deep diving expedition where a toad was caught on camera at the bottom of loch ness
i wonder how he’s doing
There's a lot of dumb ass animal cruelty takes in general but my favorite is the people who think you need to force sled dogs to pull.
Have you ever walked a dog before in your entire life? They love to pull. They're the pullingest damn things you ever saw. They'll merrily rip your rotator cuff in half like a phone book for the chance to stick their own face into a pile of old feces. They'll drag you down the road while you go through all 5 stages of grief trying to make them stop.
There are hundreds of products on the market promising to get ordinary non sled dogs to stop pulling their hapless owners down the road and spilling their iced coffees. People have gone so far as to use electric collars to try and zap sense into their poor stupid labradoodle that wants nothing more but to suicidally pull itself and everyone it loves into the snarling maw of the nearest leash reactive pit bull.
A dog that's allowed to pull, nay, encouraged to pull, is probably the most self actualized animal on the planet right after seagulls that live somewhere with food stands outdoors.
Can’t stop thinking about how all of S2, Aziraphale is throwing himself at Crowley physically (the hand on his chest in the bar, the dance, the hand on his shoulder when Gabe and Beez say being together is more important than sides) waiting for Crowley to make the next move, while Crowley is throwing himself at Aziraphale emotionally (trying to make the humans fall in love by engineering a rainstorm, letting Aziraphale drive his car, recommending Alpha Centauri as a place for Gabe and Beez to go). And how in the final 15, they finally get closer to giving the other what they have been asking for all season, but it’s twisted and miscommunicated: “come with me” Aziraphale says and all Crowley hears is “to heaven”; “I need you” Aziraphale says, and all Crowley hears is “to change for me”; Crowley grabs Aziraphale and kisses him the way Aziraphale has wanted all season and Aziraphale, thinking it’s a temptation away from Heaven, forgives him instead of kissing him back.